One Particular Harbour
Thoughts about life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness from Dave Darby.
All posts in Coaching
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How do you know what it means?
Dec 26, 2010Posted by Dave Darby
Read more »A very old Chinese man and his young son lived during a period of much civil strife. They were considered rich by the villagers because they owned a horse.
One morning, the son awoke to find his horse had run away. Running to his father, he informed him of this tragedy, saying this was the worst thing that could have happened. His father, in all his wisdom, replied, “Is that so? How do you know what it means?”
The next day, as the boy was working in the barn, he heard the sound of horses galloping in the distance. When he looked up he saw his horse leading a herd of wild ponies to him. Seeing this, he ran to the house shouting, “The horse has come back leading a herd. This is the greatest thing that’s ever happened!” In all his wisdom, the old man replied once again: “Is that so? How do you know what it means?”
That afternoon, the boy decided to tame one of the ponies. As he proudly sat atop the new-found gift, the horse bucked, throwing the boy to the ground causing a broken collarbone and a fractured arm. As he was placed in his bed by his father, he said, “All those horses coming – that’s the worst thing that could have happened.” Once again, the old man spoke: “Is that so? How do you know what it means?”
The next day, father and son were abruptly awakened by the sound of militia knocking on their door. They were here to take the boy to fight in the civil war. The old man said, “There he is, take him.” The captain took one look and said, “He’s useless to us,” and left. The boy said, “This is the best luck I’ve ever had.” And the old man, in his wisdom replied, “Is that so? How do you know what it means?”
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If
Jun 25, 2010Posted by Dave Darby
Read more »If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you
But make allowance for their doubting too,
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or being hated, don’t give way to hating,
And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise:If you can dream–and not make dreams your master,
If you can think–and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build ‘em up with worn-out tools:If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it all on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: “Hold on!”If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings–nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much,
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
And–which is more–you’ll be a Man, my son!~Rudyard Kipling
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Don't Be a Sucker
May 14, 2010Posted by Dave Darby
Read more »PT Barnum said “There’s a customer born every minute.” Yup. Now as with many quotes attributed to famous people, this one is more likely to be recounted as “There’s a sucker born every minute.” While it is disputed that PT Barnum was that disingenuous with his customer base, this quote is also true.
Here’s the problem with the cocky, American economy as I explained some time ago in Economic Cannibalism – we are so proud of our role as the world’s leading economy of consumption that we don’t even realize that we are eating ourselves to death.
And we are suckers for urgency and chaos. So what do snake oil pitchmen do? Never mind importance, they only need focus the gullible masses on urgency. How about a few examples:
- “Sunday, SUNday, SUNDAY!” – great for selling monster rally tix
- “Yours now for only 3 LOW monthly payments!” – most as seen on tv ads
- “But that’s not all folks, order within the next 10 minutes and we’ll DOUBLE your offer!” – most as seen on tv ads
- “Billy Mays here…” – enough said
- “Don’t wait, ask your doctor about Cialis” – gotta love pharmaceuticals skipping the middleman here – MDs study for 7+ years, consumers on average, 7 minutes, nice
And do we really “need” another set of knives? Yeah, the can-cutting thing is cool and I’m sure the tomato drop/perfect split took some skill/practice, but really – have you seen most people’s over-crowded knife drawers?
The point is – if you have overstuffed drawers, can’t get your car(s) in your garage, have a loaded attic (or storage unit) and generally find yourself struggling with clutter – well, you have been duped, sucked right in. You see, we should be following our passions which should be only a few things, I mean, who has time for more??
But, when we are sucked in, we consume/buy until we have trouble storing everything that somebody else told us we ‘needed’. And these people convince us to place a high urgency on something that is of little importance to our life or survival. So, don’t be a sucker. Put a stop to the madness.
a) don’t follow priorities that are urgent but not important and
b) don’t ignore priorities that are important to the point that they become urgent.If you do, you’re just chasing your tail and your focus will always be survival. If you break free and pursue ‘real’ priorities – well, welcome to significance and your Ideal Life and you will be surprised at how much time you will have for leisure – who hates that?